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How to Have an Attractive Personality

Being attractive comes more from your personality than from your appearance, and demonstrating an attractive personality is key to making friends and having lasting relationships. To have an attractive personality, cultivate the ability to communicate naturally, develop a sense of humor, and build a confident disposition. These traits give you the ability to inspire and fascinate others, making others more drawn to you as a result.

Part1

Communicating Naturally

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    Listen to others. Listening is a trait that is often forgotten about in today’s society. Instead of responding to a text, opening an email, or thinking about your next meal, pay attention to what the other person is saying. Show them you’re listening and interested by commenting on the story or asking questions.
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    Speak sincerely. No one likes to be duped. Tell people the truth. If you can’t commit to something, it’s better to be honest about it than to have to tell them last minute that you can’t make it. When people ask for your opinion, you should be honest.

    • There is a difference between honest and rude opinions. For instance, if you don’t like your friend’s shirt and they ask you about it, respond with, “I really like you in blue instead,” rather than, “I hate it, it’s ugly.”
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    Know “how” vs “what.” How you say things is arguably more important than what you say. If you try to give someone a genuine compliment, but they think you say it with a sarcastic undertone, your compliment won’t mean a thing. Be aware of the way you speak.[1] If you notice that people often take things you say the wrong way, there’s a good chance you can change how you speak. Ask your friends to make you aware of the way you’re coming across.
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    Help others communicate. Get a bunch of people together for a fun get together. It can be as simple as a gathering at the park, or as extravagant as an elegant dinner party. Either way, it shows them that you care and want to spread friendship.

Part2

Having a Sense of Humor

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    Laugh at yourself. If you do something silly, laugh at yourself instead of feeling embarrassed. It shows that you’re comfortable in your skin. A sense of humor makes someone more engaging and delightful to be with.[2]

    • Remember that there is a time and place for humor. It is a great ice-breaker or stress reliever, but don’t ruin a serious conversation with inappropriate jokes.
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    Show enthusiasm for everything. Even if something makes you slightly uncomfortable, attack it with a smile on your face, an open mind, and a sense of humor. Not every day is going to be perfect, but being enthusiastic can help you accomplish anything. When you act this way, people will love being around you.
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    Make laughing a priority. Laughing at yourself isn’t quite enough if you want the most attractive personality. If you see value in making others laugh and keep laughter higher on your priority list, you’ll be a happier person.[3]

    • A great way to remind you to laugh more (and to share it with others) is to have daily jokes on your phone or email. Set them for a time of day when you notice yourself start to feel drained.

Part3

Exuding Confidence

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    Have confidence in how you speak and act. You should always say what you believe in, be willing to take risks, and have the ability to admit your mistake without being worried about what other people will think. Doing this shows that you have self-confidence. This helps create an attractive personality because it shows that you’re comfortable with yourself and that makes others comfortable around you.[4]

    • Asking questions is important when it comes to confidence. The more you know, the more comfortable you’ll feel when speaking about things. Never be afraid to ask questions.
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    Have confidence in your body. Dressing appropriately and having good posture show confidence. You don’t have to have the “perfect body” to be confident in it. People will be more attracted to you if you dress well, respect yourself, and carry yourself well.

    • If you need a little boost, place post-it’s around your mirror that remind you of the parts of your body that you love. Focus on these rather than the things that you’re self-conscious about.[5]
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    Know the difference between confidence and cockiness. While confidence is endearing, cockiness is very unappetizing. People will turn away from your personality if you’re all about yourself. A great way to avoid this is to remind yourself to compliment others. Every day, find 5 people to give compliments to. They can be strangers, co-workers, or friends. Either way, this will help you stay grounded.
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